Thunderstorms

So I am ready to post on this blog and I realize I can't upload the picture I took. We just got a new laptop and I don't know how to do it. So here is a post without a picture.

In this picture was my children. All 6 of them lined up on the couch watching American Idol. Yes, you read that right. I let them watch American Idol. Usually it is just Amelie and Ricky but it was all tonight. Let me share why.

Thunderstorms.

The wonderful, spring thunderstorms are here.

I had a very looooooong day. By long day I mean whining children, newly mudded carpets (I know, why do we have a carpet???), kids hitting, stepped in yogurt, peed through diaper and the list goes on. So by 7pm I am ready to ship them off to bed. On days like today.

I get them into bed and the thunder booms. Of course! It is designed this way. Right when you put the kids to bed but they aren't asleep yet....BOOM! This left 2 littles running out of their rooms in terror. I am tired and frustrated by this point. I raised my voice and sent them back off to bed. No, I am not perfect. I then threw Callum and Reagan in bed together. BOOM! They start screaming. I tried putting Cohen in with them. BOOM! Nope. Nothing was working. I then told them that they could come out until the storm passed. As much as I was ready for my break it felt pretty good to do the right thing. The right thing meaning it felt right. I saw all 6 lined up and it felt right. I smiled. Sometimes doing the hard thing turns out to be the easy thing. When the show was over they went happily to bed and are now sleeping. This leaves their mom feeling good instead of guilt. There are many more thunderstorms ahead. I hope I deal with them as graciously as I did tonight.

The "Sex" Talk

I don't get it. I don't get why it is so hard for parents to talk to their children about sex. First of all, I don't use the word sex while talking to them. I say Making Love. Isn't that what it should be? Sex just seems so physical minus the emotional side of it.
I think this is where parents go wrong. They are afraid. They are afraid of saying the wrong thing, giving their children ideas, of them growing up. They are afraid of "the talk."
I have heard countless questions on the subject from mom forums, magazines and Facebook. What is so hard about having a discussion with your children?
I just read a question..."Should I show my 8yo daughter a diagram of how her period will start?" Seriously? She is 8! Yes! While I probably wouldn't bring my child to the computer and show her a diagram I would most definitely share this knowledge with them.
Let me share with you how I taught my children about Making Love and all that fun stuff.
When Amelie and Ricky were around the age of 3 or 4 they asked how their baby sibling ended up in my belly. We are a Christian family so I first shared that God gave us that baby and thought we were the perfect fit. Mom and Dad love each other very much and we are married. Dad has something called sperm inside of him that God made. Mom has eggs from God that when they get the sperm inside of the egg turns into a baby. Isn't that amazing? It really is an amazing thing that God did. How could something from Dad go inside an egg inside of Mom? Obviously only God can do something like that! The next question was..."How does the sperm get to the egg?" Well because God made mom and dad fit together like puzzle pieces. Dads penis fits inside moms vagina and that is how it gets in there. They said "Oh" and that was it. They have always known and not made a big deal out of it. It really is that easy! Why so many books on the subject? Why so many programs and websites? Why does it have to be so hard?
Another one. Menstration. Half of the population gets it. Why would this be so difficult to discuss? I have explained to the girls what to watch for and what we do about it.
If we explain everything like it is a gift from God then we can't go wrong. We have periods so we can have babies! It is allowing us to carry a baby inside of us. A child of God.

One day I will have a discussion with my children about Love! Now there is a much harder discussion in my opinion. They need to be taught about feelings. Appropriate feelings. About the difference between love and lust. About appropriate behavior and what God wants for us.

The facts...easy. The in depth conversation about Love...eeeeek! That is a conversation that I don't want to mess up. I want them to fully understand how important it is to wait until marriage.
I haven't decided how exactly to have this talk. If it is going to involve Dad or if it will be me and the child alone. Of course throughout their life they have been taught this but I do what to have a good sit-down talk about it.
Many parents do not have this very important talk. Kids are left wondering. Kids are left asking their friends. Kids are left to discovering themselves. It is our job as parents to prepare our children for what is to come. We all know that our children will have hormones and they will have feelings. I plan to be aware of that and have open discussions with my children. What are you doing?

Being Confident

The most important reason we homeschool/unschool in pictures. <3

I remember when we started homeschooling. I read every book in sight about it. I learned all about John Taylor Gatto and other homeschooling guru's. I read blogs, websites and bought loads and loads of curriculum that we didn't need. I mean, my daughter was THREE!

I anticipated the much talked about socialization questions and doubting family. I couldn't wait for the battle. I was right! I spewed out every fact and every detail about homeschooling in favour of it. I think that by fighting against everyone I was also fighting against my own doubts. My own insecurities. I wanted to believe just as much as I wanted everyone else to believe. I was fairly confident but did still have that little bit of doubt nestled deep within me.

I knew that we would be put under a microscope. "She is so sweet because she is homeschooled!" "He was rude because he is homeschooled!" Everything we did would be because we homeschool.

To be honest I don't think all the reading in the world or all the talking in the world can bring you to the place that you need to be like experience can. Sure little Johnny at homeschool co-op could read chapter books by the age of three but that isn't the same as seeing your child learn and grow on their own. Bit by bit, it happens.

Seeing my children yearn to read and learn all on their own inspires me. I see little wheels turning constantly. I hear questions like "How big is an inch?" to "Why is the ocean blue?" I listen to their laughter and their navigation of relationships. Seriously, how can they not learn. Now when someone asks me questions about homeschooling or make comments about it, I don't feel the need to argue. I will answer questions respectfully and possibly change the subject. I no longer feel the need to be right. It doesn't matter to me what others think. It really doesn't. That is because I know what is right without a doubt. I wish I could go back to when we were just starting on this journey and tell my old self - Calm down. Take a deep breath. Don't buy that. Smile and nod. That doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. Take a deep breath. Calm down. Smile.

Here is our yummy Hadley Jude. Her picture was taken by a wonderful local photographer. You can check out her website @ Dana Marchand Photography.

Our Hadley is growing so fast!

If I had to say one thing about parenting that is so very cliche I would say:

They grow so fast. If you blink, you will miss it all. It is hitting home lately.

Amelie and Ricky no longer need help in the tub.

I can leave most of them playing in the tub alone.

The oldest 4 can go outside together without me.

I need to cherish each phase as it comes. Each smile. Each hug. Each whine and cuddle.

I wish I could keep them young and by my side forever.

One day this chaotic house will be quiet and clean. I surprisingly don't look forward to those days.

The Appointment

The appointment. OH the appointment.

We had an appointment with a Ped for Cohen. The first on the list was vaccinating. Why don't we vaccinate. I am an irresponsible parent who needs to be protecting her children. Apparently that isn't what I was already doing. I expect this disagreement when I go to the doctors. I smile and nod. There is no need to argue with a doctor about vaccinations.

To be honest, I wouldn't mind vaccinating for some diseases. I have asked Ron to research and we will come to a decision together. If doctors would admit that there are sometimes severe adverse reactions then we wouldn't be as hesitant. It gets covered up and Voila! No proof. I have read enough stories to confirm that it does happen. Just admit it.

Next came eating. Cohen has a hard time with many foods. He eats very healthy foods and is constantly adding new foods. We never make our children eat something they don't like. 5 of our children are wonderful eaters. We have one who gags over most foods. As a parent I feel it is important to respect your children and work around things. Obviously the doctor felt differently. He needs protein he says. He is shorter than most kids his age and lighter than most kids his age. Woopdeedoo. Ron was the same way. His name was Scrawney Ronnie. Cohen eats eggs, peanut butter and GASP chicken nuggets. I even suggested getting a protein powder to put in the smoothies and he said NO. You are his mother and you need to sit and make him eat REAL food. It just gets better and better, doesn't it?

AND the grand finale.....Are you ready for it? He acts like this because he is UNSOCIALIZED! He needs to be in school so he can learn how to socialize properly. This is when I got mad. I am very confident with our homeschooling. There are field trips once a month that he is a part of, play dates, park day, Sunday school, his siblings...PLEASE! If he was any MORE socialized he would need naps from being too tired! He thinks kids should be around other kids their own age. OH so my children shouldn't be talking to adults, no babies, no teenagers. He says that they shouldn't be learning their activities from someone who would be say 14 because of the way 14 year olds act! Well, he obviously hasn't met the 14 year olds I know. I would be proud to have my son act like the teenagers he knows. The 14 year olds I know play with children, respect and love their parents, are parts of church youth groups, have intelligent conversations with adults, are happy, well-rounded people who are amazing at giving good examples. So please don't tell me it isn't healthy for my children to be around a 14 year old.

By this point I am saying Thank you for your time. So as a homeschooling, non-vaxing, co-sleeping, gentle discipline and no Crying It Out mom, I sure have my mountains to climb! Isn't that what we should be doing though? Fighting for our children to be the best we can be for them. Fighting for their minds, their hearts and their integrity. Fighting every doctor, uneducated people for what we believe in? I feel this is what is best for my children so I do it!

Of course I prefer to not fight and stand back but when it is needed, well, that is what I am here for.

One picture is at Christmas with the kids. They are all in the PJ's I made them.

Another picture is of our Hadley Jude.

The other is Reagan in her bed with the quilt I made her. I tell her that she is surrounded in my love. She is. <3

My baby daughter has Mastocytosis. I don't know if it is Mastocytoma or Urticaria Pigmentosa. We have been very busy researching. Thank you for the understanding with not writing so much lately. A lot of our plate.

I have not written in a while about our adventures. We have been a busy family enjoying each other and well...living. I will write a nice post soon.