Saturday, March 17, 2012

Why worry?

My 3yo son wants to stay with mom or dad always.
My 3yo son still sometimes wears diapers and loves his soo soo. (Only allowed at bed)
My 7yo daughter still does not like to be away from mom or dad.

Do you know what I am getting at?

Do we as parents allow our children to have security blankets or do we demand that they grow up and have independence? This really is well thought out by most parents.

We have the parents that say they would never allow their child to sleep in their bed because they would want to all the time.

We have the parents who stop nursing at 6 months because they don't want their child to become too dependent on them.

Then we have those parents who allow their children to come into their own when they are meant to.

I have never left my child somewhere where they are uncomfortable with it. Not once. I just don't believe in it. Did you know that that was our deciding factor in homeschooling? I was told by the secretary to pry Amelie (at the age of 3) off of my leg, turn around and walk away. Obviously she didn't know who she was talking to. If she expects her own mother to treat her like that, what is stopping from them to treat her like that?

When did it become "them or us?"

We can still be there for our children AND be there for ourselves.

I have had various children sleep in our bed at different times. Guess what? Ron and I still had time on our own. Our children are evidence of that. I can guarantee that they will not be 15 and still crawling into our bed. One day this won't happen. Bitter sweet.

I used to worry when my older children still had a soo soo and they were considered too old. Will they ever give it up? I shouldn't have given so much time to worry. Yes, they do give it up and it is forgotten. I don't even remember Cohen or Reagan with a soother and it wasn't all that long ago. I have learned to let it go and let him have it at night. Again, I am pretty sure he won't still use it at 15.

He still has diapers about 60 percent of the time. Meh. Cohen used to hide in the curtains to poop in his diaper and he was almost 4. Did it hurt him? Nope. I hardly remember him in diapers and he has just turned 6. Why did I ever worry that he needed diapers at almost 4. For the record, he wasn't 15 when he got in underwear. Callum is still out for debate. I am not worried.

Why do we fret and worry and judge when in the grand scheme of doesn't matter? Let them be. Let them be ready for what lies ahead. I wish I could go back and know that things like potty training, what they eat, using soo soo's, talking late, bathing every day...didn't matter! At each age their will be new hurtles to jump and we will do it just fine. On our own time.

Thursday, March 15, 2012


So I am ready to post on this blog and I realize I can't upload the picture I took. We just got a new laptop and I don't know how to do it. So here is a post without a picture.
In this picture was my children. All 6 of them lined up on the couch watching American Idol. Yes, you read that right. I let them watch American Idol. Usually it is just Amelie and Ricky but it was all tonight. Let me share why.
The wonderful, spring thunderstorms are here.
I had a very looooooong day. By long day I mean whining children, newly mudded carpets (I know, why do we have a carpet???), kids hitting, stepped in yogurt, peed through diaper and the list goes on. So by 7pm I am ready to ship them off to bed. On days like today.
I get them into bed and the thunder booms. Of course! It is designed this way. Right when you put the kids to bed but they aren't asleep yet....BOOM! This left 2 littles running out of their rooms in terror. I am tired and frustrated by this point. I raised my voice and sent them back off to bed. No, I am not perfect. I then threw Callum and Reagan in bed together. BOOM! They start screaming. I tried putting Cohen in with them. BOOM! Nope. Nothing was working. I then told them that they could come out until the storm passed. As much as I was ready for my break it felt pretty good to do the right thing. The right thing meaning it felt right. I saw all 6 lined up and it felt right. I smiled. Sometimes doing the hard thing turns out to be the easy thing. When the show was over they went happily to bed and are now sleeping. This leaves their mom feeling good instead of guilt. There are many more thunderstorms ahead. I hope I deal with them as graciously as I did tonight.