Let them be who they are

So the kids have started soccer.  It is always exciting in the beginning.  They get up early to put on their socks, shin pads, shirts and shoes.  Very early.  This has been much anticipated all year long.  Soon the june bugs will make their appearance and half of my children will be sitting in the grass playing with them.  The sun will get hotter and we will be steaming, sitting, anticipating when soccer will be finished.  I love to see my children grow.  Which brings me to my next post...growing and punishment.
When your children are in a sport, do you allow them to quit?  At what point would you allow this and why?  We have always given our children the option on quitting.  Gasp.  If they dislike a sport, they stop.  If they don't want to be dropped off somewhere, don't.  Ricky is a good example of this.  She played soccer when she was 4.  She didn't like it.  She has watched her siblings play for 4 years and has finally decided she wants to play.  She gets all dressed up and is excited to play.  Right in the beginning of the game she got hurt.  That was it.  She sat on my lap and cried about not wanting to play anymore.  Now a lot of parents would get upset and send them back out.  But to what cost?  Sure your child will play.  Big deal.  I had a talk with her about why she didn't want to play.  She said she thought she would like it now but doesn't.  It isn't only because she got hurt.  It is because she is shy.  She would prefer one on one interaction and we have always known that about her.  I am still proud of her for stepping outside of her comfort zone.  Guess what.  For years she has not wanted to go somewhere without Ron or I.  We always stay or she just comes with us.  Today she said she wanted to go to Sunday School and be down there on her own.  She did it!  She didn't need us.  Our little Ricky is growing up.  Sniffle.  Was it that hard to follow what she needed?  Was I worried about her being 20 and never letting us out of her sight?  No.  They grow up.  Way too fast actually.  So if your child is not feeling the independent thing...don't push it.  They will get there on their own time.  Let me tell you something about Ricky.  She is the sweetest, most giving child I know.  She has a huge heart and is always putting others before her.  She is observant and enjoys doing things on her own.  She is artistic in the way she dresses as well as her art.  She is shy and she is ours.  I love her exactly the way she is.  If I would have shoved her out onto the field or dropped her off without her consent, she wouldn't be who she is.  Now that is a sad thought.